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A 1798 Memorial
Now mounted on the wall
outside St. Edmund's Church, Kingsbridge, South Devon,
England to gravedigger Robert Philip, nicknamed "Bone
Philip," has this epitaph:
Here lie I at the chancel
door,
Here lie I because I'm
poor.
The further in the more
you pay,
But here lie I as warm as
they.
Thanks to: Paul Moynagh in
the UK
Previously published in
RootsWeb
Review: 28 September 2005,
Vol. 8, No. 39
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Milligan gets last laugh on grave |
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Spike Milligan decided on his epitaph
before he died in 2002 |
Comedy legend Spike Milligan has finally got the
last laugh, more than two years after his death.
It follows an agreement with the local diocese
over the wording on the headstone of his grave
at St Thomas's Church in Winchelsea, East
Sussex, England.
Relatives of the former Goon have now decided
that it can bear the star's epitaph: "I told you
I was ill."
However, the inscription had to be written in
Gaelic in order for it to be approved by the
Chichester Diocese.
Milligan, who was an Irish passport holder, was
buried close to his home in Udimore after he
died, aged 83, from liver failure in February
2002.
It now bears the words "Duirt me leat go raibh
me breoite", or "I told you I was ill", and the
English words "Love, light, peace". |
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"Here lies my wife
Here let her lie
Now she has peace
And so do I!"
In memory of Lettuce
Manning:
Oh cruel
death
To satisfy
the palate,
Cut down
our Lettuce
To make a
salad.
On
the grave of Ezekial Aikle
in
East Dalhousie Cemetery, Nova Scotia:
Here lies Ezekial Aikle
Age 102
The Good Die Young.
In a
London, England cemetery:
Ann Mann
Here lies Ann Mann,
Who lived an old maid
But died an old Mann.
Dec. 8, 1767
In a
Ribbesford, England, cemetery:
Anna Wallace
The children of Israel wanted bread
And the Lord sent them manna,
Old clerk Wallace wanted a wife,
And the Devil sent him Anna.
Ruidoso,
New Mexico, cemetery:
Here lies Johnny Yeast
Pardon me For not rising.
Memory of
an accident in a Uniontown, Pennsylvania cemetery:
Here lies the body
of Jonathan Blake
Stepped on the gas
Instead of the brake.
In a Silver
City, Nevada, cemetery:
Here lays Butch,
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger,
But slow on the draw.
A widow
wrote this epitaph in a Vermont cemetery:
Sacred to
the memory of
my husband
John Barnes
who died
January 3, 1803
His comely
young widow, aged 23, has
many
qualifications of a good wife, and
yearns to
be comforted.
A
solicitor's epitaph in England:
Sir John Strange
Here lies an honest lawyer,
And that is Strange.
Anonymous
in Stowe, Vermont:
I was somebody.
Who, is no business
Of yours.
Lester Moore was a Wells Fargo Co. station agent
for
Naco, Arizona, in the cowboy days of the 1880's.
He's buried in the Boot Hill Cemetry in Tombstone,
Arizona:
Here lies Lester Moore
Four slugs from a .44
No Les No More.
John
Penny's epitaph in the Wimborne, England, cemetery:
Reader if cash thou art
In want of any
Dig 4 feet deep
And thou wilt find a Penny.
On
Margaret Daniels grave at
Hollywood Cemetery Richmond, Virginia:
She always said her feet were killing her
but nobody believed her.
In a
cemetery in Hartscombe, England:
On the 22nd of June
- Jonathan Fiddle -
Went out of tune.
Anna Hopewell's grave in Enosburg Falls, Vermont
Here lies the body of our Anna
Done to death by a banana
It wasn't the fruit that laid her low
But the skin of the thing that made her
go.
Owen Moore in Battersea, London, England:
Gone away
Owin' more
Than he could pay.
In Winslow,
Maine:
In Memory of Beza Wood
Departed this life
Nov. 2, 1837
Aged 45 yrs.
Here lies one Wood
Enclosed in wood
One Wood
Within another.
The outer wood
Is very good:
We cannot praise
The other.
On a grave
from the 1880's in Nantucket, Massachusetts:
Under the sod and under the trees
Lies the body of Jonathan Pease.
He is not here, there's only the pod:
Pease shelled out and went to God.
The grave
of Ellen Shannon in Girard, Pennsylvania:
Who was fatally burned
March 21, 1870
by the explosion of a lamp
filled with "R.E. Danforth's
Non-Explosive Burning Fluid"
Harry Edsel
Smith of Albany, New York:
Born 1903--Died 1942
Looked up the elevator shaft to see if
the car was on the way down. It was.
In a
Thurmont, Maryland, cemetery:
Here lies an Atheist
All dressed up
And no place to go.
In a
cemetery in England:
Remember man, as you walk by,
As you are now, so once was I,
As I am now, so shall you be,
Remember this and follow me.
To
which someone replied by writing on the tombstome:
To follow you I'll not consent,
Until I know which way you went.
Self Wriiten Epitaph
When
people's ills, they come to I
I physics,
bleeds, and sweats 'em;
Sometimes
they live, sometimes they die;
What's
that to I?
--I.
Letsome
Epitaph
for a Dentist
Stranger! Approach this spot with gravity.
John Brown is filling his last cavity.
A
marker in Enosburg Falls, Vermont
Here lies the body of our dead Anna
gone to death by a banana
It wasn't the fruit that dealt the blow
But the skin of the thing that laid her low!
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